If Ezra had to bet, he'd say that the Ithaca City Attorney's office had to be most happening place in city hall. Suing the City of Ithaca has to be something like a local past-time around here.
There used to be a nice little barber shop next to the State St.Theater run by an African American fellow. Someone in the City Planning Office decided that a black owned business didn't fit into the desired profile for the downtown Ithaca shopping area. (Or wasn't producing enough tax revenue.) After all, what do you have down there next to the State now?. An adult bookstore, a sleazy bar with a big red neon rooster above the entrance. Typical upscale establishments.
So this oaf decides to shut down the barber shop, using code violations as a monkey wrench to drive it out business. Predictably, the
barber sues the City and claims that his civil rights were violated. He wins in court and the City gets slapped with a $700,000 settlement. (This figure is approximate; Ezra can't always bother to do his homework -which in this day and age should improve his credibility rather than tarnish it. Numbers are such bullshit anyway!)
Just today the Ithaca Journal announced that this guy is suing the city for over $1 million for various claims arising from a traffic imbroglio with Ithaca's acting police chief back in Janaury. Seems that Ms. Signer tried to play bumper cars with her pickup truck, scaring this dude half to death. They stop, get out of their cars and Signer roughs the guy up; The cops arrive, rough the dude up some more and haul his ass off to jail. He gets out, finds a lawyer and sues the City for civil rights violations, harrassment, emotional and physical distress, Another job for the City Attorney's office.
Let's not feel so bad for Ms.Signer that she didn't get the top job in IPD.(Should she apply for a position with the Israeli Security Forces or the New Jersey state troopers?) Ms. Signer did, however, handle the situation in DeWitt Park very diplomatically when a group of women decided to go topless. Everyone was waiting for her to go shirtless in sympathy which would have presented a real dilemma for City brass.
So what's new? There's a bunch of buffoons running the show at City Hall. But we knew that! They should all run for Congress or at least manage the Homeland Security Department. Wrap Buffalo St in duct tape. Hire the Keystone Kops to track down Osama. Put everybody with the name Mohammed in a detention camp out in Romulus. Raid falafel joints and monitor people who order hummus
with their bagels.
So, if you can't find a job, can't make enough money washing dishes at Cornell, don't like the hours working in a convenience store, sue the City. Allowing dogs on the Commons may provide a great opportunity for litigants and their attorneys. Get some little Schnauzer to take a bite out of your leg and sue Ithaca for lifting the pooch ordinance.
Comments invited at: ezrakidder@gmail.com - Peace, Ezra at 6:44 AM
