A Journal of Humor and Verbal Anarchy

 
ithaca sucks undy media center

welkom to the ithaka undy media center, an open to my cronies publishing forum powered by boa constrictor, tonka toys and the enlightened hackeysackers of Ithaca. Anybody can publish to this sitcom but me, arkangel, may hide your post, chuck it in the ole waste baskit or you know what with it if you disagree with my pseuo-progressive point of view.

Newswire

bush gets xmas card from saddam hussein by arse32@cornell.edu

You liberals think that we invaded iraq to grab all the oil and line the pockets of the president's fatcat contractor buddies. What a crock of shit! Oops, inappropriate language. Arkangel may hide my post. We sent 250,000 troops over to Iraq to steal the solid 14 carat gold bathroom fixtures from Saddam's presidential palaces. The truth is finally out! Saddam Hussein is living in Texas along with Adolf Hitler, Idi Amin, the Shah of Iran and Josef Stalin. Because evil never dies and one day it will take over the whole world.

Reply to article:

Arse32 is really Joe Sabia in drag by Anonymous

Don't listen to a word he tells you. Arse32 is really a patsy for the neocons up at Cornell.

This website sucks by JoeSabia@cornell.edu

It's not true. Arse32@cornell.edu doesn't even go to Cornell. He sneaks into the library to use the internet connection there. And Arkangel still can't spell. IthacaSucks Undy Media is a fraud perpetrated by commie hackeysackers who want to trample on everything that is sacred, get free food at the soup kitchen and never wash under their armpits. Take that, you liberal swine.

Cop Watch

Police Chief Loo Doesn't Wash His Hands After He Uses the Loo by Anonymous

It's true. I watched him.


Editorial

Why you should shop at 10,000 Villages this Christmas by chriskringle@10000villages.com

You hear a lot of negative stuff about globalization these days. How workers in the developing world are exploited, how corporations are wasting the environment in cashpoor countries like Vietnam. (As if all B52's and all that napalm didn't already do the trick.) Well, it's not true that all globalization is bad. The staff at 10,000 Villages right on the Ithaca Commons is prepared to prove to you this holiday season that you can consume poorly crafted products from the 3rd and even the 4th world and still have a social conscience. For instance, we have rhinoceros skin toilet seats made by the happy villagers in East Africa on sale for only $179.50 that will make any progressive bathroom look more contemporary. And bedroom slippers made from kalula bear fur all the way from China produced by contented internees in a government relocation center. Many of the happy workers at this center are political activists too and took part in the demonstrations in Tinanmen Square. Find out what 10,000 Villages is doing to help these global workers become more self-sustaining. Take part in our annual can drive and send a nonperishable gift that can enjoyed around the campfire. Those Chinese internees love Beefaroni! Have a conscience and shop at 10.000 Villages this holiday!

Reply

???????? by anonymous

Hey, what the f---k? This isn't an editorial!

So what by arkangel@undymediacenter.org

Who cares? They give us a discount.

Community Calendar

Hacysackers Annual Thanksgiving dinner at Loaves& Fishes Soup Kitchen Friday, Nov 20.

Anarcho-Feminist Marxist-Leninist Zapatista Senior Potluck Dinner at Moosewood Restaurant, Thursday Nov 19. We'll be serving veggie bacon burgers!
Comments invited at: ezrakidder@gmail.com - Peace, Ezra at 7:25 AM