SECRET CODEFans have probably been wondering what this is all about ---it’s in yesterday's blog ????????? Those funny little symbols that appear every once in a while on the pages of IS.
How would Ez know? Those suckers have begun appearing in his blogs of late and it's getting rather disturbing! Like having a infestation of cyber fleas, or could they be some shit like virtual mouse droppings? Or,maybe they're just part of a visual hallucination? Maybe Ez is the only one who sees them? Are all the generic bathroom cleansers that he accidentally ingested as a kid finally catching up with Ez? Or the mushrooms he had in his 20's?
How would you even reproduce thing like that on your keyboard? Believe him, Ez doesn't have a special Lapp top? Hahah! Get the joke --Lapp, Laplander. And, as far as Ez knows, it’s is not part of the Finno-Urgic alphabet, Finno-Urgic being the language of the Sami or Laplanders, like you should have known that, right? Like doesn't everyone in Ithaca have a friggin' PhD or something. You try to eavesdrop a conversation at Gimme and you need an OED, the Cliff Notes to Finnigan's Wake, and the original Prose Edda, for cryin' out loud.
Actually, Ez was going to do a blog on some of the emerging poetic voices that he's bumped into in I-town, MFA's run around this town as ubiquitously as squirrels.
Liquid on formica follows patterns the eye makes—
mustachioed Juan Valdez painting faces on the beach—
or a woman carefully pouring French springwater into ice trays—
On the sill a transistor radio is decomposing into static:
buzzkill turpentineLike, ain't that your new favorite poem? It was hard to give up "Stoppin By Woods on a Snowy evening" but Bob Frost would understand.
But, instead, Ez finds it necessary to get to the bottom of it’s.
Now, do you think someone in City Hall has taken out a contract on Ez's blog. Who else would Ez be referring to except Madame Peterson, the occidental Spider Lady of Ithaca politics? So, what if she paid a cyber ninja to infect a virus into Bloggercode that would slowly eat away at the text? Whatcha think? Is that a likely scenario. Ez sort of feels like that Russian ex-spy Alexander Litvinenko who was murdered by drinking an isotopic Vodka gimlet or something.
Tell Ez that it ain't so! That all his hard work will one day deteriorate into screenfulls of it’s.
Anyway, you're probably wondering what this object is at lower right corner of your screen. Well, it's an Ithaca Sucks decoding device. And you can get one by sending $19.95 to Ezra Kidder. It will help you to get to the secret meaning of Ithaca Sucks, you know the Kidder Code, even when it's been gutted by it’s. It will also enable you to decode most of the poems coming out of the Cornell MFA program these days.
Ez needs the money, he's a hunted man. His days as a blogger are nearly over.
Comments invited at: ezrakidder@gmail.com - Peace, Ezra at 6:13 AM
